2020 Update:
Every time this story comes back into my life, the distance and experiences I’ve gained change my perspective slightly, but it still inspires me. Through a combination of circumstance and practice I’ve learned that prioritizing your health, your sanity, your family, or other values holds just as much weight as the hustle of constant production, if not more!
That being said, the burning desire to create, the passion to keep moving forward in me has not died down — if anything, it’s stronger than ever! For me, realizing how integral forming sustainable creative flows, healthy work-life balance, and prioritizing my well-being has freed me to create in more abundance through small creative acts.
I have yet to find my magic studio formula, but I’m going to keep working towards feeding that fire, in healthy and sustainable ways, so I can make more art faster–without the burnout.
Originally published December 16, 2018
I came across the post below on one of my old tumblr blogs. Rereading it, I realized how much I needed to hear this message yet again, and to feel the energy and drive I had when I first wrote it. I’ve been out of school a little more than two years, and the isolation from fellow artists, coupled with working a day job (a time-honored tradition of the emerging, and sometimes even the well established, artist), moving across the country, and the stresses of the every day, takes a toll on your energy.
One of my favorite quotes is by Jack London. He writes:
“You can’t wait for inspiration to strike, you have to go after it with a club.”
It’s become a mantra over the years when my energy and drive starts to wane. It’s easy to be inspired when you’re surrounded by the exuberant like-minds of your art family, constantly being exposed to new work, new ideas, new processes. It’s a lot harder when you’re running on little sleep and less money, applying for a second job to pay the bills from the desk of your tiny studio apartment.
But I’m still hungry, still desperate to make good art. It’s a feeling bigger than the weight of my debts or my exhaustion, and definitely bigger than my apartment. The one true constant in my life. I’m not dead yet, so I’ve got all the time I need to make as much as I can. I’m dusting off my club. I’m ready.
Be Desperate to Make Good Art
Originally published October 4, 2015
Recently a professor of mine told the class about her experience being a mom in grad school. Having to take her two small kids with her, she would set her younger son into a box of clean rags and slide him under the table to sleep while she worked in the print shop.
“I was desperate to make the best art possible!” she said, “You have to utilize the time you’re given–be desperate to make good art!”
“Art should be fun,” she continued, “But it should also be life or death!”
This really stuck a chord with me. I’ve been feeling so disconnected from my art, and now that I’m in my fifth year of art school I find myself feeling as though I’m not where I’d like to be artistically and professionally. I realized that I’ve gotten so caught up in the other aspects of my life–my job, my classes, my family/relationships, my dog–that I wasn’t spending my time the way I wanted to or in the way that would allow me to really make the most out of my time left in school.
I wanted to feel on fire about my work. I wanted to be that person who is always in the shop cranking out work. I wanted to get better, and how does one get better?
I sat down and plotted out my week visually and mathematically in order to see exactly where my time was going this week and how much I had to spend on different things that were important to me.
I’m working approx. 20 hours at my job this week, so my goal was to set aside a minimum of 20 hours to work in the studio, and found out that if I was really going to try maximizing my studio time, that I could actually fit in 25 hours, making this week’s calendar look something like this:
Which is very full, but believe it or not dog walking, travel times, and food is all factored in!
The only area that it going to suffer is spending time with my significant other (but he’s a night-person so me coming in at 10 or 11pm is fine).
Am I over-compensating? Maybe, but I feel that by going hard in the studio this week, I can get a better sense of when are better work times for me, and better plan out the following weeks.
It’s gonna be hectic, but I’m excited to see what all I can make!
